I feel trapped in my own mind.
I want to say, “I’m sad”
I’m restless and mad
I want to cry
And scream and shout on the top of voice.
I just want to let the agony out
I don’ t want it in me
I don’t want it suffocating me
With its death grip around my throat
I want to say, “I’m not okay.”
But I can’t.
I can’t because people will say,
“You’re different now.”
Or they’ll ask me,
“Why are you sad? You have no reason to be.”
I don’t blame them.
I’m not sure myself
I mean dad left with another woman
And mom is sick
But it’s fine.
It doesn’t matter to me.
I have to be strong.
I can’t be sad
I can’t be restless or mad.
I can’t cry.
If I do then I’ll become weak.
So I’ll put on a happy face
I won’t let them know
That I can’t breathe
That I hate the way I look
And the way I think.
No one will know that I care
Or that I feel trapped in my own mind
I feel trapped in my own mind.